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Findfriendz / Blogs / Asking For What You Want In Relationships

Asking For What You Want In Relationships
Published On: 17th Apr 2017 03:41 am

Some people are really good about standing up for themselves and asking for what they want or need in a relationships. Others sit back and wait, relying on their belief that their partner should know what they want or need. 

Some would say that if you have to ask, you are potentially forcing your partner into a situation where they are doing what they do not really want to do. Others would argue that the truth lies more in the fact that their partner needed a guiding hand and that without direction they would never have gotten anywhere.
In reality the only way in which you will be happy in your relationship is if you are true to yourself. This will sometimes mean that you have to ask for something or other which is important to you in your relationship. If something is important and you do not voice your opinion or begin to talk about it you will find that it simply festers beneath the surface and endangers your relationship in a far bigger way.
Your partner is not a mind reader. This is something we should all remember. Yes, you may well be on the same wave length most of the time, you may well have similar likes and dislikes and similar goals, but this does not mean that you are privy to each other’s every thought and desire. You have to talk; you need to discuss the things which are close to your heart.
This does not mean that you should be inflexible. Compromise is an essential element in any successful relationship. If you cannot set your thoughts out upon the table and discuss them freely then you are not being true to yourself or true to your relationship. If your partner will not enter the discussion then they are not being fair to you. It is then up to you to decide how to proceed. Is the matter a deal breaker or not? Only you will know the answer to this and the key is to trust your own inner wisdom and be true to yourself.
There are also good and bad ways of asking for the things which you want. In reality nobody likes to be told what to do. We like to think we have made our own mind up, even if we have been gently steered in that direction. 
When we feel we have made our own mind up we tend to seek to prove ourselves to be right. Our frame of mind is very positive and we instinctively search for ways in which to make things work out in accordance with our decision. When we feel that we have been forced into something against our wishes the opposite is the case. We all need to have the confidence to ask for what we want and sufficient awareness to ask in the right way.