When I was in the military they gave me a medal for killing two men and a discharge for loving one.
~Epitaph of Leonard P. Matlovich, 1988 (Thanks, Marlene)

If gay and lesbian people are given civil rights, then everyone will want them!
~Author unknown, as seen on a button at evolvefish.com

The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision.
~Lynn Lavner

My lesbianism is an act of Christian charity. All those women out there praying for a man, and I'm giving them my share.
~Rita Mae Brown

You don't have to be straight to be in the military; you just have to be able to shoot straight.
~Barry Goldwater

Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?
~Ernest Gaines

It doesn't matter what you do in the bedroom as long as you don't do it in the street and frighten the horses.
~Daphne Fielding, The Duchess of Jermyn Street

Homosexuality is god's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't burdened with children.
~Sam Austin

Isn't it a violation of the Georgia sodomy law for the Supreme Court to have its head up its ass?
~Letter to Playboy magazine, February 1987

Who would give a law to lovers? Love is unto itself a higher law.
~Boethius, The Consolation of Philosophy, A.D. 524

If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work: "Hello. Can't work today, still queer."
~Robin Tyler

You know what they say: You can't teach a gay dog straight tricks.
~Trey Parker & Matt Stone, South Park

No government has the right to tell its citizens when or whom to love. The only queer people are those who don't love anybody.
~Rita Mae Brown, speech, 28 August 1982

You could move.
~Abigail Van Buren, "Dear Abby," in response to a reader who complained that a gay couple was moving in across the street and wanted to know what he could do to improve the quality of the neighborhood

War. Rape. Murder. Poverty. Equal rights for gays. Guess which one the Southern Baptist Convention is protesting?
~The Value of Families

If time and space are curved, where do all of the straight people come from?
~Author Unknown

Everybody's journey is individual. If you fall in love with a boy, you fall in love with a boy. The fact that many Americans consider it a disease says more about them than it does about homosexuality.
~James Baldwin

What is straight? A line can be straight, or a street, but the human heart, oh, no, it's curved like a road through mountains.
~Tennessee Williams, A Streetcar Named Desire, 1947

There is nothing wrong with going to bed with someone of your own sex. People should be very free with sex, they should draw the line at goats.
~Elton John

I'd rather be black than gay because when you're black you don't have to tell your mother.
~Charles Pierce, 1980

That word "lesbian" sounds like a disease. And straight men know because they're sure that they're the cure.
~Denise McCanles

As a mother, I know that homosexuals cannot biologically reproduce children; therefore, they must recruit our children.
~Anita Bryant, 1977

If gays are granted rights, next we'll have to give rights to prostitutes and to people who sleep with St. Bernards and to nailbiters.
~Anita Bryant

Anita Bryant like Anita hole in the head.
~Graffiti

The radical right is so homophobic that they're blaming global warming on the AIDS quilt.
~Dennis Miller

Jesse Helms and Newt Gingrich were shaking hands congratulating themselves on the introduction of an antigay bill in Congress. If it passes, they won't be able to shake hands, because it will then be illegal for a prick to touch an asshole.
~Judy Carter

My own belief is that there is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror.
~W. Somerset Maugham

Drag is when a man wears everything a lesbian won't.
~Author Unknown

To know what you prefer, instead of humbly saying "Amen" to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to keep your soul alive.
~Robert Louis Stevenson

Do not follow where the path may lead. Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.
~Friedrich Nietzsche

My theory is that the hardest work anyone does in life is to appear normal.
~From the movie Ed TV

The plague of mankind is the fear and rejection of diversity: monotheism, monarchy, monogamy and, in our age, monomedicine. The belief that there is only one right way to live, only one right way to regulate religious, political, sexual, medical affairs is the root cause of the greatest threat to man: members of his own species, bent on ensuring his salvation, security, and sanity.
~Thomas Szasz